I Don’t Believe In Atheists

1. December 2008 by Satire V.

ATHEIST

This was the entirety of the bumper sticker on a car in my neighborhood recently. What an interesting statement. This short statement seemed to say a couple of things.

First, I thought it must be an identification in the same way as a sticker saying “Hockey Mom”, or “Republican”, or “Raider Hater”. This person must identify himself as an atheist, I thought. 

My next thought was that this just didn’t seem like it could be right. Of the two meanings of the “a” prefix, most “a”theists claim the mantle of simple disbelief.   Why would someone declare a simple lack of belief in such a public way?  I’ve never seen anyone driving around with a bumper sticker saying “I don’t believe in dragons!”, “AUFOist”,  or “Afairyist,” or any other declaration that the driver wants everyone to know what he or she doesn’t believe in.  What a colossal waste of time to state everything one doesn’t believe in.  Even selecting one item of disbelief and plastering it on your vehicle is a bit ridiculous.

 The reasoning that makes the most sense is that the meaning is not “disbelief”, but “unbelief.”  Unbelief in that not only is there a lack of belief, but an opposition to belief.  In the same way that an unwilling person isn’t simply without will, but actively resists the intended goal, atheists seem interested in actively resisting the influence of religion.  This doesn’t seem so bad on the surface, but when many of these people feel the need to actively resist the influence of religion on those who do want it, they go too far.

 Look at writers such as Christopher Hitchens; or listen to almost any member of Amerikans United for the Separation of Church and State.  There is an apparent need to try to make those who believe out to be ignorant rubes.  Why?  Why the shrill tone, the anger, the search for anything that might have the slighest scent of God about it that must be excised from public life?  Are these people really afraid that religion is going to take over the government?

More importantly, why do atheists seem to have such an axe to grind with Christianity in particular?  Christianity has had no more evil committed in its name than any other religion of note.  Secularism has been the source of far more misery than any religion.  So, why such hatred of Christianity?  Many atheists grew up in Christian families.  (many Christians grew up in atheist families as well)  Many of these unbelievers claim that there was rampant hypocrisy in the religious life of those close to them.  I suppose it is easy to be without any hypocrisy in secularism.  All one has to do is not have faith.  Christianity may be the focus of their ire because the God of Christ will judge each person on their own merits.  There is a requirement of personal responsibility.

Perhaps it is the idea of being held to an external standard that frightens atheists, for I believe that fear is at the root of atheistic anger.  It is easier to make angry statements about the stupidity of the faithful, easier to fight any public display of symbols of religion, and easier to say that God is not, than it is to accept responsibility for their life.  The only good that comes from this is that many atheists are otherwise decent people.  Knowing that if they behave in keeping with an atheistic belief, they will be challenged for selfish and amoral behavior, they end up living by most of the Commandments.  If they truly believe that there is no higher power, and that we are random collections of molecules, they should feel free to behave in any way they want.

Back to the Atheist of the bumper sticker.  He recently removed that sticker and replaced it with another that shows arrogance and a failed thinking process.  His new sticker reads:

“Dare to Think For Yourself”

How arrogant to tell others what they should dare, and what hypocrisy to tell others that they should think for themselves.  The statement is oxymoronic on its face.

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